Garbage Lady: In The Wild


Amid the baron wilderness of Brooklyn in Winter, a rare sight emerges: the elusive Garbage Lady in her natural habitat. Note how she stands idly on the random street corner, almost as if she has nothing better to do. Is she lying in wait? Stalking prey? Posing for a photo? Let’s move in for a closer look.

Ah! It appears our Garbage Lady has foraged a wild…banana.

The Garbage Lady swings into action! It’s a classic “hand in face” defense mechanism. Let’s not forget we’re dealing with a highly predatory species. Just look at those outstretched and uncut finger nails, poised to kill. Proceed with caution; this one will clearly go to any length for the sake of food.

The Garbage Lady appears to have spotted her mate. Observe the exaggerated pop of the hip, the slight upturn of the lips. She also seems to be brandishing her banana in an effort to display her…wealth. The mate acknowledges these advances. He is unimpressed.

She is now conversing with her banana for no apparent reason.

Another sighting! The illustrious Shiba Inu has graced us with his presence. No defense necessary here; even the somewhat obtuse Garbage Lady knows when she’s faced with such prestige. She makes her offering. It’s deemed adequate.

The time for migration has arrived. Where will the Garbage Lady go? Who’s to know. An educated guess would lead somewhere either thrifted clothing or pickles may be procured. She dons her protective layer. We must bid adieu to this miracle of nature. Look! She’s left us her banana peel. A token of friendship among this complex species. Or, you, know, let’s just assume it’s a nice gesture.

 

Outfit Details:

Shoes: Beacon’s Closet

Pink Dress: Monkie’s Vintage

Sunnies: Awoke Vintage

Everything else: Found in random estate sales throughout rural North Carolina.