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Winter Survival Hack: Consider a Swimsuit
Your swimsuits texted me; they miss you. Take all the time you need to process that image, but come right back! We have crucial matters to discuss. First of all, on a scale of one to a cow with influenza, how utterly sick of your winter wardrobe are you? If you’re feeling nauseous, due to…
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Buttons: Superfluous in the Face of Silk
Not to be predictable, but I picked this outfit from a garbage bag. Had I an ounce of common decency, I would have prepped for my photo shoot with creative goddess Paige Klingerman by neatly packing two, maybe three outfits in one of my large but sensible tote bags. But apparently, such is not the…
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Here’s one more way to wear your vintage scarf
There’s been a territory dispute raging around my skull for some time now. I feel about a vintage scarf the way Jiro feels about his sushi. Especially when they’re simultaneously silk and eccentric. And I live to tie them in strange ways around my neck. But I also enjoy earrings the size of Spongebob Squarepants…
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The Perks of Wearing a Festive Hat
We humans have devised many a creative way to protect our beloved brains: Helmets. Sombreros. Literature. The options range wider than Michael Phelps’ wing span. But once Winter rears its snuggly head, that myriad of choices invariably dwindles down to a single species of hat. We call them Beanies. Unfortunately. The extent of your experience…
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In Celebration of our Lower Halves
Attention: The party has been temporarily relocated from within the pants to the actual pants themselves, with a feisty pre-game session to be had in the form of chunky disco shoes. I’d like to take a few sentences and give credit where credit is exceedingly due. Our lower halves. To begin: the body part that…
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The Real OG: Pondering Pierre Balmain
I awakened Wednesday of last week and began the day as usual. Calisthenics with Vladimir, my personal trainer. Thirty minutes of scales, Beethoven and Rachmaninoff at the Piano forte. Two and a half raw eggs. Bee pollen smoothie ‘cause I was feeling extra peckish. Ten minute mirror pep talk culminating in a twenty second…
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HeartBelt Musings
I think you’ll recognize the type I’m about to expound upon. Even if her existence is confined to the realms of television and self-help books. Picture the woman who not only owns a planner, but actually writes stuff in it. Her phone screen remains unscathed by the archetypal inebriated tumbles of mere mortals. Calling the…
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Garbage Lady tells all: The Austin Vintage Scene
Examine a margarita closely and you’ll find many of the elements involved in my vintage shopping excursions throughout Austin, TX. Please imagine the following: Salt- Represents the profuse reapings of my sweat glands Green hue- My rabid outfit jealousy Sassy citrus flavor- Funky vintage finds of equal or greater sass-levels Consequent loss of clothing- My…
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JusTIN Time: An Interview with Thomas Althaus of Canned Goods
Unless your childhood can be most aptly described as Veruca Salt-esque, I’ll assume you’ve cooked at least one item of food in your life. Correct? Scrumdiddlyumptious. Now, let’s take just a brief moment to pay homage to the awe-inspiring powers of culinary metamorphosis. Consider: that powdery substance known as flour. Thought by most to…
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Sartorial Problem Solving and Fast Fashion Rehab: An Interview with Tara St. James of Study NY
I’ve begun to see a bit of the reason we have so much wrongdoing here on earth. All too often, doing the right thing takes work. Telling your Mother you accidentally knocked over her priceless antique vase is a far more daunting task than simply lying about it and walking away is easier than going…