Position Description: Startup seeking rockstar of a CEO intern! Passion for CEO’ing is a must. Our ideal candidate is a hardworking go-getter who’s creative and detail oriented, but not so much that you notice we aren’t paying you. If you’re a motivated, driven, ambitious (and rich) college student interested in the corporate domination industry, then boy is this the perfect opportunity for us!
Who we are: We were sort of thinking you could figure that out for us? But here’s some stuff we like:
-Money
-Long walks on the beach
-Ethics?
-Jeff Bezos
-Investments?
– “Marketing buzzwords”
-Not data breach scandals
Responsibilities:
-CEO stuff
-Going viral
-Doing our laundry
-Maintaining the illusion of competence
-Boosting overall money making
-Ruling the office with an iron fist
-Getting coffee
Requirements:
-A real passion for CEO’ing!
-Must be an actual rockstar. With tour dates and stuff.
-Willingness to work independently, as a team, on weekends, at night, at dawn and without any direction from us whatsoever.
-BYO MacBook Pro, Keurig machine and a willingness to share
-Must know really big words to say in meetings like “revenue”, “depreciation” and “Instagram Model”
-Family money
Salary:
Unpaid. But just think of all the room for growth!
We can probably offer you college credit, but we’ll have to Google how.
Location:
Kalamazoo, Michigan. Could work remotely.
Hours:
Mon-Fri 8am to 1am
To apply, send us your resume, a short business plan and a $50,000 investment. We look forward to hearing from you!
2 responses to “Startup Seeking Unpaid CEO Intern”
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